LOVE


I went to see a movie today…I actually went to see Polar Express..but when I got to the theatre, it didn’t begin until tomorrow so I decided to go see a movie called Amor Silencioso or Silent Love. I knew nothing about the movie…but it turns out to be a Mexican/French Canadian movie. It is about a Montreal Anglophone who finds a mail order bride from Mexico…he meets they decide to get married but she wants her mother to come with them to Montreal. While the couple never fall in love and the Mother seems to prevent love blossoming just by virtue of the fact of being there. The mother decides to go back to Mexico to give the newlyweds a chance at love, but the husband realizes it is the mother he loves not his wife and leaves for Mexico to tell the mother of his love. Of course the movie doesn’t have a happy ending...the newlyweds divorce and the mother rejects her daughter’s husband’s love…it’s a real love story! Do love stories have a happy ending? I know very few fairytale love stories with happily-ever-after endings. Yes, my parents have been married almost 50 years, but it has not always been happy and it didn’t start out as a love story but as a gunshot wedding as my mother was pregnant and in the late 50’s you got married or went away had the kid and gave it up for adoption. Well they chose marriage and I arrived five months after the wedding. They are still together but probably not because of love but because of hard work, respect and financial reasons, I am sure in their case, romantic love existed but it didn’t start that way and I don’t think it is the case now, but more of a convenient friendship.

But perhaps it is because we all know few real love stories with happy endings that we keep searching for it and in this day and age give up easily relationships we have because we feel that the true love story does exist and we will find it.

And lets face it the hunt for love can be fun. Who doesn’t remember seeing someone you have an immediate attraction to whether it is physical, mental or spiritual or a combination of two of these factors or all threes. Who can’t relate to the first time we have sex with someone for the first time we feel attracted to? The brain rush of endorphins…tasting that first kiss, be it slow and passionate or wild and forceful. Of exploring a new body for the first time of the attempt we make to ensure our partner enjoys that first physical experience. Because we are so attracted to them we want to impress them with what we feel is our best attempts at sex or making love. We want them to want more, to come back, we want to win their heart, their respect, we want them to like us and this is usually all before romantic love. So perhaps when we don’t find love or we are rejected in love those physical relationships stay in our mind longer, because we never got what we wanted...even though the sex could be awesome. And when we finally do win someone’s heart, respect and love we forget to work hard at the relationship to keep it alive and well…..perhaps because we want that hormone filled, endorphin laced, rush of being with someone you are seriously attracted to again and again, but can it be that sensation with the same person over and over again???….maybe….I’ll keep looking for now.